Sunday, 18th April.

I'm feeling quite strong right now, but at the same time so weak. I'm completely set on where I am heading and that makes things just that little bit easier. I'm trying so hard to do well at school, but I'm constantly reminding myself that it is not everything, that I don't need to wear myself out, I just need to try my hardest. I haven't taken photographs in such a long time and it's starting to take an affect on me. Today I am going to get out there, go for a walk and take pictures of just about everything I see, hopefully I will find something beautiful. I had a stomach flu for a week and that really got me down, now it seems I have a cold. My immune system is down and the timing could not be worse. So, now I'm trying to healthen myself up a bit. Less social drinking/smoking and more going for walks and feeding myself good food. I think my body is screaming for me to do that right now. Now, I adore winter. I love snuggling up near the fireplace, the fashion, the fact that it means my birthday is fast approaching but I need sunshine. Without sunlight I feel dark and a bit lost. I've been told I have Seasonal Affective Disorder. Which generally means your mood is affected by the weather. When it's sunny my mood is generally a lot better than that of a dark day. Which is somewhat ironic as I adore rainy days. Next Tuesday I am going into my last real term of school ever. It's pretty stressful because the majority of my subjects are major work based, meaning they are due in August, but that does mean less pressure when it comes to the exams. By the end of August extension two english will be out of the way completely. I cannot wait till that day. A night at the pub will be in order. Life is just that little brighter because of a certain boy. He treats me so well and it's scary how alike we are and how happy he makes me. I'm very lucky. Tomorrow will be our one month anniversary of being together and it's just gone by so quickly. Time is flying. I can't believe I will be eighteen in three months. I mean, I feel it, I just can't believe it. Time is such a crazy concept. Life is okay at the moment, I feel stable and I haven't felt that in quite some time.